Here is a song I wrote, it will need fine tuning but was just wandering if anyone has any music ideas when they read the lyrics!

Mr Tennessee

Take me to the floor, so I can dance of this high,
shaking of the sweats and the colours in the sky. 
I can see the shadow at my side, he’s got no-where to hide.

Chorus

“Lost in this dream, staring up to the sky,
with Mr Tennessee by my side, keeping me high, keeping me high”
Devil on the outside and devil inside,
Mr Tennessee keeps making me high.

Shallow in the mind has a weakened my soul,
I loose all control, I loose all control.
I look to my friend to feel lost again but he’s empty inside, empty inside.

Chorus
“Lost in this dream, staring up to the sky, with Mr Tennessee by my side, keeping me high, keeping me high” Devil on the outside and devil inside, Mr Tennessee keeps making me high.

Wandering the halls as the chills set in,
alert in my in and I’m terrified, cant push
these coherent thoughts aside.
Clutching to the wall with my friend in sight
I feel the high its back inside. 

Chorus

”Lost in this dream, staring up to the sky,
with Mr Tennessee by my side, keeping me high, keeping me high”
Devil on the outside and devil inside,
Mr Tennessee keeps making me high.

No point in fighting this feeling inside,
Mr Tennessee keeps making me high,
Im. gonna swallow him whole, feel him flowing inside.
Burning my soul and leaving me high.

Chorus

“Lost in this dream, staring up to the sky,
with Mr Tennessee by my side, keeping me high, keeping me high”
Devil on the outside and devil inside,
Mr Tennessee keeps making me high.

Written by Sara Williams ©

Hi Sara,

it’s all very, up in the sky,. Dont know what you are getting at here

there is no clear story, Who is Mr Tennessee?

It all needs to be a lot clearer, as it is it’s like random thoughts that do not go together. in a clear piucture.

You are telling not showing, so you create no clear pictures or originality.

Hi Peter,

Mr Tennessee is whiskey, the song is about somone who likes to get drunk all the time to get high! For a first attempt I think its ok but like any song it may well need tweeking! But I will defend myself in saying the lyrics are very straight forward in that its about someone searching for there high - Mr Tennessee.

Thanks for your views on this, all comments postive or negative are apprecaited because they will help my future writes.

:@)

Hey Sara,

Any luck finding a melody?  I really believe these lyrics have potential with the right music.  I don’t know what genre you have in mind, but I know you hear a male vocalist doing this lyric.  Let me know where you are on this, I may have something/someone in mind if you are still up in the air.

Ron

Hey Ron,

No music to it yet am open to any ideas you have!

Drop me a line on sarawilliams28@fsmail.net

Thank you!

Sara
:@)

Hey Sara,

I don’t know if you have anyone working with you on Mr. Tennessee yet, I have music about finished, and I did re-arrange some verses, re-structered to 2 verses, chorus, 1 verse, chorus, bridge, chorus.  I can post changes here or e-mail them to you, then, if you are comfortable with the changes, I will e-mail a rough take of the song, just let me know.

Ron

:) :)…

Hey Ron,

Can you email to me on sarawilliams28@fsmail.net

THank you so much lookinf forward to seeing and hearing! :@)

Ron,

Ive just seen your email!

Thank you so much for taking the time out on this one! Love the changes they really make the lyrics complete, I like the way they just flow into each ohther!

Im so excited it about this now! :@)

Cant wait to here the music to it!

You can get me on my email as above or I or on here I check it daily.

:@)

Hey Sara,

You have music in the mail.

Ron

Ron,

THANK YOU SO MUCH!

I have responded to your email! Great job Im over the moon with what you have done with “Mr Tennesse” You have brought it to life!

Look forward to hearing from you.

:@)

Hey Sara,

I have to Thank You, it was your lyrics that were the inspiration, they planted the seed, your enthusiasm made it grow, so I Thank You for the opportunity to work with you.  I will be sending another e-mail shortly, you are talented, good job.

Ron